Every now and then, I think about my life, why I do the things that I do and also the color cerulean. I think about cerulean a lot because of Meryl Streep’s monologue in “The Devil Wears Prada.”
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The FSU Flying High Circus is wrapping up its spring series this weekend, which is perfect timing for many Tallahassee stoners.
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When the stress of calculating what final exam grade is needed to pass your failing class finally reaches a boiling point, a lack of student apartment benefits should be the last thing on your mind.
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With the semester both gloriously and painfully coming to a close, one would assume students are grudgingly familiar with the procedures and structure of their classes by this point.
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With the idea of grocery shopping being a chore only done out of desperation and random health kicks, refrigerator supplies in the overpriced broom closets that students call homes across Tallahassee simply aren’t holding up.
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There are still, like, 30 weeks left in this goddamn semester and Hell is inches from freezing over. Maybe you also woke up this morning and poured coffee in your dinosaur eggs oatmeal. One group of friends has been gripping each other tightly for support in these last trying weeks.
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With the end of the semester quickly approaching, students are diligently working to survive classes with the least possible amount of effort. Students in CLP4134 -- Somewhat Abnormal Psychology -- have been fishing through their old, ugly pairs of cargo shorts from high school in search of loose, expired Adderall just in time for their final research paper.
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With only four weeks until exams, honors students and honors-adjacent students across campus are seeking comfort from the most drastic sources with the most asinine plans.
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The days of guesstimating the macros of your bi-weekly alcohol consumption are finally over. Thanks to the new update of Under Armour’s frighteningly cult-y “MyFitnessPal” app, users now have the option to log all of their pint-sized shooters with the click of a button.
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A staple in the department of English is the infamous Article and Essay Technique class.
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Despite being seven months into the school year, freshmen are still having a difficult time understanding the difference between discretion and clinking bottles past 9PM every night to let their neighbors know they're having way too much of a good time.
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Fuck a flux-capacitor. If anything on the road is going to play God, it sure isn’t going to be some scientist in a sports car.
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Everybody has their own unique, foolproof method to decompress as we enter the annual spring existential crisis season.
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Though everyone already knew that tow truck drivers work largely under the guise of moonlight because they’re a special breed of fairytale villain, rumors surrounding one driver’s mythical kink are circulating Tallahassee.
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Evan Rhodes is not sexist, or so he announces in his toothpaste-speckled mirror every morning before longboarding to class and scratching at the fresh coat of pink nail polish on his thumb.
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Covered in tan lines and still smelling of sunscreen and unspecified bodily fluids, students are flocking back to FSU’s campus this week as classes start back up after spring break. As they adjust back into their mundane, un-debaucherous routines, some have managed to keep their wild vacation memories alive.
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The sun is shining, clocks are rolling forward and half of FSU’s campus is waking up with bloodshot eyes that they can now successfully blame on that pesky yellow pollen. All of this serves to remind us that the season of rebirth and trashing public beaches has arrived at last.
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First written by the Gods, there are two core principles upheld by every college student across the country: the ability to perform any basic task at the last possible minute and the frenzy that ensues trying to find an internship that will wiggle their foot into the door of that cruel, baby boomer world.
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With half of the Spring semester already completed, students can finally take a moment for themselves and enjoy a much needed break from schoolwork.
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Move over anyone who thinks they're Woke™, there’s a new activist taking little gay campus hearts by storm. Professor Charles Jones has bravely stepped into the spotlight as a champion for the poor, voiceless LGBTQ students of Florida State University by coming out as a straight ally in the middle of his IFS4200 course titled “I’m Socially Liberal but Fiscally Conservative.”
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