The Eggplant’s Official FSU vs UF Drinking Game

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It’s that time, baby! Now is when the FSU community comes together regardless of sex, gender, race, social class or opinion on cilantro in order to collectively remind UF why we’re superior and they are dumpster babies. If you’re not creative like us, follow these rules to enjoy the most fun and effective drinking game on this side of the Suwannee River. Remember, we are not responsible for any and all football-induced emotional suffering, fights with your boyfriend outside your apartment or broken lamps.. Drink responsibly, Noles. The Gators can choke!

Rules:

  • Take a shot every time someone says “Go Gators” or “God I can’t wait for this game to end”

  • Drink when Jimbo starts sobbing uncontrollably into his clipboard

  • Ten second chug if everyone collectively walks out because both teams suck right now

  • Shotgun a handle of Patron if FSU scores a touchdown

  • Scream as loud as you possibly can when someone fumbles a ball

  • Finish your drink and try not to vomit when you feel physically uncomfortable looking at orange and blue together

  • Have a childhood trauma induced flashback when your dad texts you sympathy because “FSU just isn’t the same this season”

  • Crack open another cold one when the Florida fans do any sort of chant (you’ll need it)

  • Get cross faded when your boss texts you to come into work even though you’re hammered and it’s your day off

  • Spike your warm Angry Orchard on the floor when the Marching Chiefs play so loud they break the sound barrier

  • Squeeze the lime for a tequila shot in your eyes when Al the Gator and Renegade battle to the death on the field

  • Just fucking take a shot because you need one

  • Eat a tissue soaked in Kirkland Vodka when the camera pans to Francois looking sadly at the game

  • Assume the fetal position when we lose in the last 6 seconds

  • Smash a Four Loko onto your head in solidarity when someone gets a doggamn concussion

  • Take a shot, throw it back up and swallow it back down if we get another targeting penalty

  • Pour one out for Dalvin Cook because we miss him so much oh my god please Dalvin if you’re reading this come back

  • Do a very nice kegstand if 69 Dickerson shows up

  • Summon a winged serpent and bite its head off every time a villager challenges your claims of arcane supremacy

  • Stab your uncle with a broken bottle when he asks you what you even do with an English degree

  • Whenever someone appears on screen doing the chomp, shove your mouth full of needles and ice and maybe even poison

  • Draw and quarter Bobbert Bowden as soon as you see his nasty old Republican face

  • Image Credit: Mike Ehrmann/Getty Images

The Eggplant FSU