WVFS To Host Jack Denton’s New Radio Show, “Crybaby Court”

In a shocking turn of events for absolutely no one, FSU’s SGA Senate President Jack Denton has taken yet another step in avoiding any possible consequences for his actions by moving to the FSU Supreme Court to argue for his reinstatement. It seems a congratulations is in order for notorious transphobe Denton on not only his reinstatement as SGA Senate President but also for his exciting new radio show coming to WVFS, aka the “Voice of Florida State.” The show is called “Crybaby Court” and will be an investigative look into Jack Denton’s time fighting both FSU and federal courts to uphold his baseless homophobia. 

“It’s going to be great,” remarked Denton, snickering. “I can’t wait to really show the FSU student body my side of the story, which didn’t work the three times I’ve done it before. I know I’m technically supposed to represent the entire student body, but like, what if they don’t represent me? I know I graduate basically next month, but I want to wreak as much havoc as I can on this school before I go. This radio show is just another way for me to exercise my first amendment right. These snowflakes just don’t like to hear anything they don’t agree with these days. Anyway, vote Amplify in the November election!” 

“Yeah, ratings are down,” said WVFS disc jockey Sam Cunningham. “We needed something that would stir the pot, get the students talking. We’ve been recording a lot with Jack in the last couple of weeks, trying to get enough content to air the show. It’s been really tough because mostly he just comes in and drools all over the desk and microphone. I’ve even seen him reading off of the Fox News homepage on his phone when he can’t think of anything to say. He brought all the court documents with him on the first day of recording and tried to get everyone in the office to read them,” said Cunningham, who quickly realized he was not doing a very good job of publicizing the show. 

Apparently, the only time slot that WVFS could get for the show was Tuesday at 2 AM, so, listen if you want? The next time you’re on Zoom listening to a five-hour student senate meeting, be sure to queue up the radio show for your offline listening. We’ll all be watching and waiting for Mr. Crybaby’s next big, inevitable mess up while keeping our fingers crossed for that appeal to go through. Remember, Hell is hot, Mr. Denton.