Spotify Wrapped Shows Guy Listened to 35 Hours of Kacey Musgraves to “Prove He Respects Women”

The holiday season is a time for sharing. Some people share gifts, while others share notes of affection. Most importantly, some people share their Spotify Wrapped information for all 789 of their Instagram followers to see. You know it’s December when every single one of your friends posts Instagram stories showcasing their top genre as “Indie Underground Rock” or “Undiscoverable Alt Jazz.” Like anyone actually gives a fuck that their Summer C suitemate’s top song of the decade was “Broccoli,” the guy who shared his top artist as Kacey Musgraves really wants you to know that he “totally respects women.”

“I listened to Miss Musgraves’ music as a way to connect with women in a more spiritual way. I grew up in a household full of girls. It was always just me, my mom, my little three sisters, and my nan, so I got pretty used to respecting women and their music from an early age,” said Justin Goodman, senior film school student, while ranking his favorite female directors on Letterboxd. “35 hours of Kacey Musgraves might sound like a lot, but when you grow up with Dolly on repeat 24/7, it truly is nothing. I think it goes without saying that I fully respect women in all forms.”

“He really is such a great boy,” said Goodman’s mother, Sherry Goodman, in her note to him in a care package. “My little Justin slept in bed with me until he was 14. I had to practically beg him to spend the night in his own bed. His sisters, Annabel, Allison, and Reba love him so much, too. He would sing them Taylor Swift before bedtime, and on special nights would close with a Streisand ballad. I think it’s quite beautiful how he can remain so confident in his masculinity while empowering female artists and the youth. I must’ve done something right.”

Although not everyone exudes as much confidence in their music choices, almost every person you follow on Instagram will share their top artists with their followers at some point (as long as Tame Impala or Mitski is somewhere in the top three, of course). As annoying as they are, Spotify Wrapped is a great way to come up with inspo for a fire holiday gift while also getting a glimpse into the brains of your peers. Besides, that one friend who claimed they love Vampire Weekend actually listened to 3,445 minutes of One Direction this year, and you can’t let them get away with that.