Honestly, you should have expected it.
Read MoreA well-rounded FSU student exhibits mastery of balancing school, work and social endeavors, all while keeping in touch with family back home. Some do it because last time they were in class and didn’t pick up their mother’s phone call, she called FSUPD claiming they were dead.
Read MoreWhile most students in your literature class are just kind of going off what the last person said, some of the dweebs who actually do the assigned reading show up ready to discuss whatever novel you avoided in high school.
Read MoreIn the habit of joining every resume boosting club in high school, FSU freshmen of all majors are desperately looking to join any sketchy club with heavy fees and questionable objectives. While many have decided to go the fraternity and sorority route, others who claim they would never “buy their friends” have decided to take the moral high road and pay for their qualifications instead.
Read MoreAs we settle back into the Fall semester after having to restart school all over again, the pressure is on to spend every weeknight at Recess, mildly disappoint your parents and do your best impression of a student who actually did the reading.
Read MoreTad Gomez was thrilled to let his hair down this weekend as he reportedly received upwards of three Facebook invites from two enigmatic Tinder matches and one guy he met during the ghost tour at orientation.
Read MoreDue to mild winds turning every Tallahassee tree into the Whomping Willow, students city-wide anticipated long term power outages from hurricane Irma. Thankfully, the majority of these students were faced merely with slight flickers in power, affecting not much more than the time displayed on their sauce splattered microwaves.
Read MoreWith the economy vaguely being the way it is these days, college students everywhere are looking to save money on everything from food and rent to textbooks and stolen answer keys. Many students, however, lament in the unyielding prices of the various vices available to FSU students.
Read MoreWith the threat of Hurricane Irma looming on the horizon of Florida, Tallahassee citizens are wasting no time preparing for the storm’s arrival, and for the entire city’s power grid to fail after a single raindrop touches down.
Read MoreThousands of disappointed sorority hopefuls ran home last week to their sad, overpriced apartments at their safety schools instead of the exclusive, overpriced mansions of their dreams.
Read MoreWhen I first decided to study abroad, I thought the experience would be the perfect excuse to continue blacking out at the pregame and waking up the next morning to find I had, in fact, thrown up in my purse but now in a totally new environment.
Read MoreBefore the stress of the semester floods in, non-STEM majors and club promoters alike love to market “syllabus week” as a time to get a jump-start on the fun and debauchery of undergraduate life at Florida State.
Read MoreI have never been one for school spirit. In high school I didn’t care for our awful sports teams and wasn’t really all that concerned with repping our mascot, the Blobfish.
Read MoreGrades so low you're thinking of dropping out? Considering joining a multi-level marketing company and calling it a career because you have no options left? Try these fun, definitely-not-illegal tips instead and see if you can finish this semester with grades that will make your parents love you again.
Read MoreResults from the first stage of the French presidential election rolled in yesterday, an extreme relief to nervous European investment markets.
Read MoreWith graduation less than a month away, Florida State University has broken the Guinness world record for most people exhibiting the acute stress response simultaneously.
Read MoreListen up you moist banana nut muffins, Brew yourself a nice cup of Tazo Zen tea, which a certain knockout actress who also practices Transcendental Meditation would probably love, because I’m about to delve into a highly controversial topic.
Read MoreThirsty Thursday took a wild but somehow unsurprising turn this week when area senior Haidi Khan downed a seventh tequila shot and clambered her way onto the Recess bar.
Read MoreConfirmed by none of his high school school classmates, 20-year-old pawn in a pyramid scheme and self-proclaimed entrepreneur Mike Pachowski has definitely almost made his first billion by now.
Read MoreFSU Yoga Club recently took a retreat to a sunny lakeside to realign their chakras and talk about their gluten intolerances. Following a hypnotizing downward dog pose on the first day, it is reported that Yoga Club president Rainbow McWind unconsciously got up and guzzled down the club’s entire food supply of 15 bottles of essential oil mat spray.
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