Freshman Who Would Never "Buy His Friends" Currently Taking Out Loan To Join Honor Society

In the habit of joining every resume boosting club in high school, FSU freshmen of all majors are desperately looking to join any sketchy club with heavy fees and questionable objectives. While many have decided to go the fraternity and sorority route, others who claim they would never “buy their friends” have decided to take the moral high road and pay for their qualifications instead.

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The Eggplant FSU
Yoga Club Spells Out SOS Message, Here’s What We Know

FSU Yoga Club recently took a retreat to a sunny lakeside to realign their chakras and talk about their gluten intolerances. Following a hypnotizing downward dog pose on the first day, it is reported that Yoga Club president Rainbow McWind unconsciously got up and guzzled down the club’s entire food supply of 15 bottles of essential oil mat spray.

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The Eggplant FSU