Freshman Struggles to Keep Up “I Didn’t Peak in High School” Social Media Façade

After successfully getting accepted to Florida State University and moving away from home, freshman Ashley Lester was eager to show her high school friends, specifically her cheating ex-boyfriend from junior year, Jason, all that she could be in college. For the first few weeks she was able to adhere to a strict schedule of replying “going” on Facebook to three interesting on-campus activities every week, an “accidental” yet still beautiful snap sent to Jason during every football game showing how much of a blast she’s having, and one politically relevant article share a week that she may or may not have actually read. Unfortunately, she hit a road bump after remembering that she actually has classes to focus on. “If I fail my classes, then I won’t be able to humble brag about my grades at the end of the semester with some sort of, ‘I am not one to really do this, but…’ caption, and if I don’t have that then what was the point?” Panicked Lester while hiding behind her textbook in Strozier and avoiding high school acquaintances at all costs. “They can’t see me like this. It’d be like the Wizard of Oz reveal...disastrous”  

To help offset the weight of such a task, Lester founded “Anti-Peak,” an organization completely dedicated to helping students keep a successful presence on all social medias, and not an organization boycotting the Twin Peaks reboot, or mountains in general. Anti-Peak meets weekly in varying photogenic spots around campus to take fun candid college friend pictures, search for Facebook-shareable content, and to talk about those from their past who definitely peaked in high school.

“It’s hard keeping this all up by myself. I figured a community of similar minded students all working toward a common goal of excellence would be perfect in this shallow of a situation,” explained Lester while searching for a filter that best fits her current Insta-aesthetic. “I would literally rather chop off my left arm than have Jason think I spend my nights covered in Oreo crumbs reading through old yearbook notes, because that’s only true of some nights. Fuck you, Jason.”