Gov. Rick Scott Admits Florida Capitol Building Meant to Look Like Penis

TALLAHASSEE, FL- One of the most unique attributes of Florida’s state capitol building is its distinctly phallic shaping. But whether or not this was an intentional architectural decision, or an embarrassing mistake has until now been left to question.

Thankfully, we at the Eggplant have finally gotten the truth on this pressing issue. Said Governor Rick Scott in response to our speculation: “yep it’s totally a dick.”

Not only is Florida the state shaped most similarly to the male penis, it is definitely the biggest dick of all behavior-wise. Between almost legal murder, fatal bugs and reptiles, deadly hurricanes and the reason Bush was elected in 2000, Florida is literally seeping with testosterone.  It almost seems like poetic justice that the Penis of America be represented just as it is. So next time you’re headed south on Apalachee Parkway,make sure to take a look up at the penis that is our state capitol and smile.