Florida State’s campaign for ethical sexual awareness, FSU Measure Up, has requested that all male students attending the university come in for an official penile measurement that will be entered into the Blackboard system.
Read More
After years of fake boyfriends and watching the L word under her blanket, student Mindy Jenkins finally decided to pull back her covers. She found her courage in Ellen Page’s speech this past Valentine’s Day.
Read More
Spring will soon be sprung here in Tallahassee and with it hopefully FSU students will start tweeting about something other than Tally’s crazy winter weather.
Read More
Follow this so you can gain insight into your FSU spirit fountain and then share your results with your family, friends, and maybe even that one weird bus driver who’s always trying to make small talk anyway
Read More
Florida State University announced today that President Eric Barron will leave the university after four years of holding the prestigious office.
Read More
After a couple was found having sex in a residence hall study room last week, a few of the dormitory hall directors are considering issuing changes to their behavior and conduct guidelines.
Read More
Florida State University announced yesterday that the university’s annual black history month celebration will conclude with a celebrity boxing match between university president Eric Barron and former neighborhood watchman George Zimmerman.
Read More
In an attempt to prove mediocre country bands that pander to the worst sections of the student body are not what this school is about, university officials announced Tuesday they have hired Childish Gambino to perform on campus in April.
Read More
In keeping with Florida State University’s longstanding tradition of racial sensitivity, university officials announced today that music icon Jimmy Buffett will perform at this years Black History Month tribute concert titled “Black History Month 2014: We’re All Just Cheeseburgers in Paradise”.
Read More
According to reports, 22 year old biology major and self-proclaimed “adorkable” nerd Jasmine Pillar smoked cannabis for the first time Saturday as a direct result of peer pressure.
Read More
Tallahassee’s night life just got that much hotter as rumors swirl that former Malcolm in the Middle and Big Fat Liar star Frankie Muniz will stop by Tallahassee’s signature clubs tonight.
Read More
Local student and self-proclaimed “nice guy” Michael Hayson has been friend-zoned yet again by some slut.
Read More
wo days after learning how to play the guitar he got for his last birthday, Trey Briggs found a spot on Landis Green and started playing Wonderwall.
Read More
Despite persistent urges from Jimbo Fisher and his teammates to get his head in the game, Jameis Winston has refused to stick to the status quo and will instead be breaking free as the lead in FSU’s spring musical.
Read More
Tallahassee’s previously mundane nightclub LIT will be reopened this fall as “AP LIT.” Under its new management, the club is being renovated to entertain Tally’s most intelligent minority.
Read More
NFL Super Bowl XLVIII between the Seattle Seahawks and the Denver Broncos will give FSU fans a chance to really focus on football for a change.
Read More
TLC announced this morning the debut of their newest show “The Red Lightning District” The show will follow the life of FSU student Frankie Malgrat, otherwise known as “Red Lightning”, and his adventures in the Tallahassee night life.
Read More
FSU freshmen have saved the lanyard business from near bankruptcy through their continual and spirited support of the fashion accessory.
Read More
One of the most unique attributes of Florida’s state capitol building is its distinctly phallic shaping. But whether or not this was an intentional architectural decision, or an embarrassing mistake has until now been left to question.
Read MoreThe Eggplant, Florida State University’s premiere satirical news source, was created in February 2014 by Houston Barber and Aubrey Burrough in an attempt to prove that not only are they the smartest and most attractive people at FSU, but also the funniest.
Read More